It’s been over 6 months since I’ve written. I have been conflicted if I should write; my heart just hasn’t been in it. I want to first confess my sin. I wasn’t writing for God; I was writing for myself. I was writing for the attention and the praise that the world could give. As I have grown over the passed few years, God has been opening my eyes and my heart. I feel He has given me new insight and so this morning, I woke up with a desire to sit down at my laptop and write.

My focus over the past year has been to work on my heart. As I have written before, I have stage 3 heart failure: specifically, cardiomyopathy with left ventricle stenosis. This means my heart is weak and not pumping the blood out of the heart into the body as it should. I experience shortness of breath and fatigue. I can’t walk up a flight of stairs and I can’t lay down in bed at night, without becoming out of breath. My heart numbers were low and the doctor was suggesting a pacemaker/defibrillator. I knew that I had to make a change. I’ll be 58 years old in about 2 months, and I wasn’t willing to accept that diagnosis. So, I put my attention to my health and I am happy to report that my last checkup, my numbers were almost normal. Praise God! That’s my recap. I ask you to forgive me for my silence and I ask God to forgive me for my pride.

Who is Jesus Christ?


He is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of his nature, and he upholds the universe by the word of his power. After making purification for sins, he sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high…
Hebrews 1:3

Jesus Christ is the radiance of the glory, of God the Father. He is the exact representation of the Fathers nature. Radiance is the dazzling light that accompanies God’s presence. John describes it in his letter as

This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all.
1John 1:5

He is perfect, pure, light. I don’t think we truly understand how perfect, how holy God is. I know we don’t understand the vast darkness and depravity of our sin, in view of His holiness and perfection. Our entire lives, the world that we live in – every moment of every day, has been tainted by sin, and wrenched from the perfection of what God created.  In the presence of His pure and holy light, there is no “little” sin. There is no “little white lie”. All sin is darkness and darkness cannot be in His presence. Nothing I can do – nothing you can do – can make up the deficit that we have, standing in front of a pure and holy God! It’s only through Christ Jesus – only through His death and resurrection – only through His work on the cross – we contribute nothing!

In light of this knowledge, how will you respond? I assure you, I have already sinned this morning, as I am sitting in my kitchen and I will surely sin again, and so will you. But how does this affect you? Will you submit to God’s transforming power in your life? That’s the kicker! I know all about God’s power and His love. I know all about Jesus’s death on the cross. The question is, will my love for the God of the universe, measure more in my heart, than my own desire?

I challenge you to take a look at your life. What do you feel the Spirit of God convicting you of? Are you like me, prideful? Do you lust after what the world has to offer? In comparison to the glory, radiance and power of God’s presence, how ugly is your sin? This isn’t about self-deprecation and self-hate. This is about seeing the truth of who God is and who we are in comparison. This is about self reflection and taking responsibility. This is about a change in posture. I believe that once submit to God’s truth, He will begin to work in our hearts, minds and especially lives, and begin to transform us. In our submission, we will gain power over the sin in our lives, and be transformed more and more into the likeness of Christ Jesus our Lord. – Amen

And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ - to the glory and praise of God.
Philippians 1:9-11